A sure path to happiness is to forgive and release hurtful feelings. It is not necessary to forgive and FORGET, but in most cases it is necessary to forgive and release the pain so you can regain your power and live with more smiles in your life.
The weak can never forgive. Forgiveness is the attribute of the strong.
Indian political and spiritual leader (1869 – 1948)
Strength of Character. Revenge is easier and let’s face it sometimes more fun to daydream about, but your ability to forgive reveals your character strength. You are in control. You chose a higher path instead of a lowly response.
“Payback” in the Best Way. Let your forgiveness be known by the other; not in a pushy or egotistical way, but in a kind hearted and informational manner. When you forgive and communicate the standard going forward, it shows you are taking the higher road and not being a push over. Shows you are in control, not subject to the other person.
Releases Defenses of Others. Communicating your ownership in the conflict and forgiving the other reveals if the other is ready to forgive you. If they get defensive they are not ready to restore the relationship, back off and give them the space and time they need to commit to their own process of positive change. I have experienced people letting their guard down when I own my role and apologize for it. Those who seemed ready to fight, all of a sudden are ready to reconcile.
Frees YOU. Forgiveness frees you from the stress related diseases and emotional binds of holding onto anger, thoughts of revenge, and even the guilt of not doing the right thing in this crumby situation.
Makes Way for the Lesson of the Situation. Forgiveness opens us to question and learn the lesson from the situation. Forgiveness requires us to be objective and less emotional, which in turn opens us to receiving the messages from our intuition, others individuals, and the universe.
Promotes the Cycle of Forgiveness. Being forgiven teaches the power of forgiveness and eliminates retaliation. Even if the other does not accept your apology or does not forgive you in return, they are positively marked by you doing the right thing. If they complain about it or compliment you for it, your correct action has their attention and is top of mind.
Brings Good Karma. If karma is real or not, forgiveness brings about a kind spirit which will attract more kindness into your life. There is a kindness and fairness in those who can own their “stuff”, seek forgiveness, and forgive others. There is strength in those who can do this and set a clear boundary as a result of the situation.
Creates Clear Boundaries. Sometimes we do not know where the boundaries are in our own lives or others. The need to forgive reveals the boundary line. This is most evident in kids, although happens at all ages. There are some kids who test to see what they can do before getting in trouble. They need to know where the line is between acceptable and unacceptable. When they cross the line and get in trouble, they know. For many kids, it’s not that big of a deal, now they simply know. For more sensitive kids, they take the correction harsher. But either way the need for forgiveness reveals the boundaries, and when we can see the situation as simple as that we know complete forgiveness and release.
Today’s SIMPLE SMILE IGNITER is to embrace one or more of these character benefits of forgiveness and allow it to play out in your life. Select one or two of these and watch for evidence of them this month as you forgive the minor and major situations in your life.